“Well, it would've been, could've been worse than you would ever know.Oh, the dashboard melted, but we still have the radio.”
-Dashboard, Modest Mouse

Oh my God.

Longest week ever! No, I haven’t fallen off the face of the earth: I have been without internet at work for 8 days. It’s unbearable in terms of having nothing to do and in falling behind in work since 75% of what I do requires internet.
Of course, Blogspot never works on my home computer (hence the lack of update, and Heidi, I did read your blog a week ago but couldn’t comment on it!).
Either way, here we are, finally having emerged from the Dark Ages (NEVER change your business account from Bell to Primus or you’ll be without internet for eons). And I'll post the results of that outdated poll tomorrow.

“Well, it would've been, could've been worse than you would ever know.Oh, the dashboard melted, but we still have the radio”

In summary then of my time not connected to the outside world:

-Kaiser Chiefs ruled! As did The Walkmen, who opened for them and of which 3 out of 5 members uncannily resembled Dirk. KC’s skipped over any song that couldn’t be jumped up and own to, which made for a great show- for sure one of the best I have seen. And I now have an ever bigger crush on singer Ricky Wilson, who fulfills the “not too meaty not too firm” category to a T. Ricky dove into the crowd- I don’t think I have seen anyone crowd surf since 1996. I touched his hand and his shoe. I feel special. I have pictures and video to upload eventually. Some of my pictures are already on Facebook.

-I won the Zip.ca weekly reviewer contest again and pocketed another $100. I also had my review with the National Post’s Popcorn Panel last week. And then I won the reviewer contest again. That’s 3 times now.

-Dan and I saw Year of the Dog. I’ve said it a million times, but to reiterate: I love Sarsgaard.
-I am thoroughly suntanned (and not burned to my own surprise) after a weekend spent outside on the deck and walking around Queen St.

-we are planning a pirate-themed deck party for later in the year, and a cottage weekend, all to be commenced sometime between now and mid-July.

-The Dance Cave Saturdays have surpassed Fridays as being the better night. You just have to put up with Spice Girls and Smashing Pumpkins….no, really. It’s actually kind of depressing. Its time to find somewhere new…possibly Revival. If only we all weren’t so cheap.

-Mr. Merv Griffin is apparently against showing any skin below the knees since he keeps biting my calves when I expose my legs via shorts or a skirt. You’ve been warned to wear pants if you come to visit.

-karaoke practicing for Cinqo has commenced. And Dirk and Natalie have scheduled a tentative arrival date of May 3rd which means a ludicrous long weekend of binge drinking, old-fashioned freak-outs, gallivanting, Dance Caving, steamrolling, and shopping.

“Oh, we talked about nothing which was more than I wanted you to know”

And, le piece de resistance:

-I got the weirdest email I have ever received. It’s so crazy, I actually had to forward it to people for confirmation that this dude was nuts. Remember back in the day when I went on a “date” with Larry Mullen Jr. Jr? Apparently, Larry isn’t too bright to pick up on my hints- ie. I’m too busy to meet him, I don’t have internet at home, I’m going away for the weekend, I broke my phone. I didn’t want to have to come out and say, “Dude- you’re crazy!” but apparently that’s what was required.
After not returning Larry’s phone calls or email for since pre-Easter, I get the weirdest rambling email ever which contained gems like (which are totally based on memory since I deleted this creepy email):
-“I’m no relationship expert, but I guess I am not Rachel material. You’re gorgeous.”
-“I’ve deleted your phone number from my cell phone so I don’t get drunk and call you because that’s what I do. I don’t want to call girls who don’t want to talk to me.”
-“I guess the reason I never heard from you to say ‘happy birthday’ to me was because you don’t want to talk to me.” (it should also be noted that Larry didn’t actually know when his birthday was…he forgot that it was the same day every year I guess.)
-“Remember when I said I was moving to Vancouver? I’m not”
-“Our dates were so good…why the change of heart?” (it should be noted that we had 1 date that was “meh” at best and a second one because I felt bad for him and spent the total of 120 minutes at a party trying to get away from him, not talk to him, and would inch further and further away from him).
-“That’s fine if you don’t want to talk to me again. Good luck in life.”

And as if you thought that was the end of it, it ends with this bit:

“We can still be movie buddies if you want and see movies together. We can chat online and talk about film. I’m always around in the city if you want to see a movie. I like talking to you because you are beautiful and funny.”

So bizarre. And hence, I am giving up on blind dates. And am guessing that I will hear from him again in one way or another since he seems stalkingly persistent. That being said, forward your single straight male friends on to me, lest even more people begin to think that Eve and I are lesbians (there’s actually a lot of them who do).

“Oh, we talked about nothing which was more than I wanted you to know”