“Wait in line, 'Till your time, Ticking clock, Everyone stop”
-In the Waiting Line, Remy Zero

First up, just to clarify:

I love YOU Peter Sarsgaard, and your patented Peter Sarsgaard SARS Guards:


“Everyone's saying different things to me”

I watched this really random movies last night called Blue Juice starring Ewan McGregor and Catherine Zeta-Jones and a poor man’s Daniel Craig. Or, more precisely, I liked this faux Daniel Craig more than the real one, so the real Daniel Craig is now a poor man’s version of himself. The movie is about surfing. In England. And Ewan McGregor has gnarly surfer hair a la Keanu Reeves in Point Break.

“Motionless wheel, Nothing is real”

The highlights from the film include a dramatic jump off of a British cliff into the churning sea to rescue Ewan McGregor who if this were a real film, would have drowned before not-Daniel Craig even got to the beach. If that isn’t enough of a climax for you, they had to rush straight from the sea to an auction where an angry Zeta-Jones was waiting because she lost her bid on a sea shack. She didn’t even seem fazed that 3 wet men in wet suits, one of whom has just been saved from drowning and is bleeding, showed up at an auction for her. The movie was terrible, except for this one dude who gets himself all painted silver and then rides a horse with a knight’s helmet on. Otherwise, for a surfing film, it was disappointed as no one was eaten by sharks or attacked by a giant squid, which we all know should come standard in any film involving the sea.

Think about it- Titanic would have been so much better if Leonardo DiCaprio had been tangled up in an octopus’ tentacles and dragged to the bottom of the sea. Or if some sort of monster whale had taken a bite out of the ship instead. Or a wolphin maybe, but if it really were a cross between a wolf and dolphin instead of a whale/dolphin without eyes. I need to parlay this somehow into an episode of “That’s Our Dirk!” Perhaps I can convince Dirk to go for a swim in Lake Ontario…

Back to work (I’m a very busy person).

“Ah and I'll shout and I'll scream, But I'd rather not have seen, And I'll hide away for another day”

Today’s Song Choices from the Garden State soundtrack:

In the Waiting Line- Remy Zero
I Just Don’t Think I’ll Ever Get Over You- Colin Hay
Eyes of Blue- Cary Brothers
Lebanese Blonde- Thievery Corporation
The Only Living Boy in New York- Simon & Garfunkel

“There doesn't seem to be anybody else who agrees with me”