“And I still find it so hard, To say what I need to say, But I'm quite sure that you'll tell me, Just how I should feel today
-Blue Monday, New Order

Never watch Kingdom of Heaven. That’s what I learned this weekend. Orlando Bloom just can’t act, is mildly unattractive, and can’t carry a film. I’m not sure if I preferred Elizabethtown or Kingdom of Heaven. Close call since both are terrible. I guess I prefer KOF because of Liam Neeson, Jeremy Irons, Brendan Gleeson, and Edward Norton as “The Leper King.” That’s right, I said Edward Norton plays the Leper King. It’s true. I actually turned the movie off to watch a much better Edward Norton film, Primal Fear.

“But if it wasn't for your misfortune, I'd be a heavenly person today”

I spent the weekend with my parents, laying around the house, eating food that I didn’t have to pay for, and watching DVDs that I didn’t need to rent. My efforts on Sunday were fruitful as I was able to not only design an album cover for Mairin’s band Carbon Dating Service, but I also uploaded the video of Broken Social Scene playing “Lover’s Spit” live.

Here are the fruits of my labour that fulfill the band’s desire for quantity over quality:


It's a tad bland, but it completes me. I met the requirements: A polar bear wearing a helmet with a lazer shooting a narwhal in the belly with a robot on a snowmobile in the background all set under the aurora borealis. I don’t have mad photoshopping skillz but it pleases me some. I prefer to work in crayon as it is more of my medium, as opposed to digital creations.

And the video:



The only other mildly amusing thing that happened to me today was that when I was buying sushi Nick Nolte’s mugshot picture fell out of my wallet on the counter in front of a quizzical Japanese woman. Yes, I do carry a picture of Nick Nolte’s mugshot in my wallet. I cut it out of a National Enquirer I found at my parent’s house. Ah “Crazy old Maurice” indeed.

“And I thought I was mistaken, And I thought I heard you speak”

Top 5 Tracks O’ the Afternoon, or What the Cool Kids are Listening To:

Little Green Bag- George Baker Selection
The More You Ignore Me, The Closer I Get- Morrissey
One Way or Another- Blondie

And because I keep plugging them today (anything to help a brother out):
The Carbon Dating Service Will Have Been Thieves (or Knights of the Periodic Table)- Carbon Dating Service
Clap Your Awkward Hands- Carbon Dating Service

“Now I stand here waiting...I thought I told you to leave me”